20 September 2010

the missing piece

though they were his and not mine, "the missing piece" sums up how i feel about my boyfriend's place in my life more than any other words can. when i think about the jigsaw puzzle that's been my life - always - there's forever been a giant piece of empty right in the middle, nothing gluing all the parts together, nothing that makes everything else make sense. until now.

living here, then there, trying this then that, traveling here, going there, planning a life without a plan, spinning in circles with no anchor to give any of it meaning. i mean, it's been fun. i've had a blast. i've done so much, met so many people, seen wonderful and exotic places, tasted the soil in a dozen countries around the world. but i've always done it alone. and i guess it always seemed okay until he came along. cuz i guess i can't know something i've never had is missing.

but now i want to share everything with him, give everything to him, be everything with him. he is the bravest person i know, for he wears his heart on his sleeve as though he's got nothing to lose (it's amazing to me that scathed by love as he's been, he still holds nothing back and hands me his heart and soul without even the slightest hesitation). and i guess he can do that because he doesn't have anything to lose by entrusting his heart and soul to me. because i love him more madly than i ever dreamed humanly possible and his every expression of undying love is met equally by my own.

he makes me realize how wrong i ever was for not wanting a rational life, a rational love, a rational world. because he makes everything make sense that never did before he fell into his place in my puzzled life.

The end.

~k